Jacky Ralph Amos

you are like wine to my soul when i read your words you bring people out of the darkness in to GOD'S light you sometimes make me quit reading and drop to my knees you know a man one time said to me the only trip worth taking was when he kneeled to pray i now know what was meant by those words janice i would want you at my side when my time to take the journey came i am a DNR____________DNR

pray my family always remembers that i want to just go the people i have taken care of are already gone their families just won't or can not let go you will take care of things in a good way you are one to be trusted your brothers and sister should be proud you are thier sister as i am you are my friend i cope in a positive way now days i can laugh out loud when i think of Micah ,Jackey will be proud of your choice's for his money more than we will ever know it is a good feeling to know your dad had a hand thier to guide him to our LORD and I am sure as they look upon you they have only good feelings jacky probably laughs as you rush from one chore to the next a day does not go by that i do not think of them all and my new friend in you i have a husband but that is another story one meant for private talks not for our boys to see i have had stuggles my whole life but blessings as well i need to count more of them than to remember the struggles we as humans can always remember the bad but we seem to forget all that GOD has given us i now make sure to thank our Lord daily sometimes more as i should have my whole life but selfishness and pity keep us from making wise choices sometimes thank GOD everyday for his forgivness and love i will always miss Micah but i also need to spend time loving those hear with me Janice my friend I love you for your heart your soul for the words of comfort you extend to me when your grief i am sure overwhelms you sometimes but you still take the time for mefor these things I love you

122 S Elmwood Ave

Kansas city mo

64123

Scarlett Garner

you send me yours as well i would love to write and could say so much more to you

(816)-241-8050 

(816)256-1723

                 i am here anticipating the day Micah left us already i find myself some where else just shake my head and wonder where i went i loved this child and i still have a hard time doing the normal things in life went trick or treating with makayla and saw this blonde hair walk by and thought Micah my heart hurts it feels as though it is floating not really even connected to my body sometimes but i know this just a feeling i have never thought of pain this way i guess i feel like a butterfly is trapped inside me irritating me all the time i need to let it settle and can not i loved him and when he left us every thing was gone

angela and baby DE' never came back home she says the memotres are just to many for her here but as his nana his memory is with me every where i go i see him at the store on the sidewalk just every where so it does not matter where i am he was once there with me

i am so damn sad all the time quitting my job was probably a mistake but i could not take it anymore the tears around me it interferred with my job i got to involved all the time i hurt for all that i was around i was not objective anymore i was not the strong one anymore people with family sick and dieing need strength from where ever they can get it and i was no longer their strenght

    i wanted to hold on to every dieing soul a little longer and they needed to let them go somehow with the knowledge they were doing the right thing and me i just thought if i could have one more minute with Micah what a day that would be and that thinking for other people was wrong i do not want to ever do harm to a family so it was time to let it go for a minute                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                  

Hi Janice~How are you and your family doing? I am sorry to hear about the passing of your Father! My heart goes out to you, alot to deal with in the last few weeks. I bet Jacky was at the gates with open arms when he Grandpa arrived. He is not suffering anymore and he is at rest. All the sickness and surgeries take a toll on their bodies.

I am here if you need me. I am not working so I am almost always sitting here at this computer!

Love ya girl and take care,

Vivian

what a joy to read your words i can almost feel your joy your smile and yes your pain mama I am so glad your dad's pain is gone and he is with Jacky and Micah he lived long and you fought hard yes mama rest and you need to see about those lungs what is causing the pain or do you already know well i have not found a job but am determine not to go back into nursing if i can help it the misery and pain in that is not for me anymore it keeps me down micah's mommie came and took his things last week 2 days and 2 trucks they sure accumulate alot of stuff baby DE" will have it now and that is a good thing she is doing good with it i was afraid for her but as usual her strenght took over and she is okay mama she is strong so srtrong  to see her face hurts me because it is pure pain even through her smiles her pain is there josh is really taking good care of her yes i said josh i have given it all to GOD he will deal with what ever has to be done or not done i just know my child and hers are very happy and what ever it takes for her to go on is good times are getting rough up this way don't know if we can hold on but we will try and if we can not we will move on somewhere else GOD will see us through you have taught me that

one year what a thing to say and now you have two people to love and miss,cherish and two angels to light your way i am sorry you lost your dad and glad his pain his gone.Love is so overwhelming I can remember even today the overwhelming feeling of love that came over me as my children were born and then the same feeling for my angie when her heart broke ,the pain i felt when Micah left us was one of such misery that i could not seem to move on well the time for me to say one year is coming quickly angela came and got all of Micah's things and again my breathe was gone and the saddness was here now the room is empty and bare and I stand in it and stare at what i do not even know where do we as mothers,sisters ,grandmothers get the strenght to just go on it is hard but we manage to get up everyday and just do it my heart is always open to the pain my mind is always here for survival be kind to your self my friend let your mind and body rest so you will be ready for the next thing that God will float your way i will be happy to see the end of 2008 this just the year of tragedy for my family GOD be with you and yours that you will see the warm sun and feel it on your face be able to enjoy one day of rest